belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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