So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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