2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
