Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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