Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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