You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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