Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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