2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
is it fun? or sober?
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