problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
