dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
