im so drunk with asians
where?
always
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
