I'm jealous of your bromance
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
