Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I think my moral compass just broke
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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