so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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