shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
