his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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