I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Dick very happy bro
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
