please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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