oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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