Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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