walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
