Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
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