Apparently you make a good broom.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize