The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
