wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
