I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
