some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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