wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
