the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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