remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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