I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
