Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize