Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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