You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
