it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize