If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
