You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize
