I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
