the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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