you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize