Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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