Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
