My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
