I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
