I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
