Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize