Her vagina should come with caution tape.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Randomize
