You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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