is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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