Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
