think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
