sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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